Happy Campers....

"I contacted Lee six months ago as I was about to make a big choice to leave my job and change my life. I wanted help from someone who was not invested in my life in any way, and thus could objectively support and challenge me as I powered through that change. I hadn’t expected to enjoy the process quite so much, or to get from Lee so much more than I’d bargained for. Do not be fooled into thinking that coaching with Lee will simply examine the practical mechanics of your life. He has got me to deeply scrutinise the how, the what, and the why of who I am with searing yet playful courage and honesty. With lightness, a sprinkling of humour, infectious enthusiasm, and beautiful spirituality, Lee creates a clear, quiet space that accepts and queries what you will unpack together. His incisiveness has often left me gasping/laughing at the eye-opening revelations about myself. I am learning to become who I am and fully inhabit an amazing life for myself, and I am deeply grateful & happy that I chose to invest in this work." Consultant & Entreprenuer, Bristol

"Thank you for the wonderful session today. I really feel such important shifts in my life, your guidance and support have been phenomenal." Unhappy wife, London

"Lee is a perceptive and non-judgemental listener with the ability to understand quickly and easily the core issues that need to be addressed. His techniques enable one to really look inside oneself and remove blockers that prevent progress. Powerful stuff!" Solicitor, Finchley

"My thankyou was heartfelt Lee. Our work together has helped me to think differently and get me through a very difficult period in my life. Thank you. You have a special gift. Speak soon." Food Entrepreneur, Hertford

"When I first met with lee I did not really know what to expect. I had lots of questions about life in general and was struggling with some issues. After several sessions I now feel more clarity and focus. The work is not done yet but I look forward to our sessions together with excitement. Lee is a good listener and will choose his replys to questions wisely helping you to gain another perspective. I would defiantly recommend to anyone who has the courage to look for more from life. Thanks lee." Electrician, North London

"I knew immediately that I had found someone with a depth of wisdom, warmth and compassion who would not hesitate to put the challenging questions but who would also be there to encourage and support me. I am now able to see the path ahead with much greater clarity and I KNOW it's the right one!" Private School Head Teacher, London Docklands

"Coaching helps you learn about yourself and feel the better for it, Lee is highly professional and always puts your best interests first." Business Analyst, Notting Hill

"I am so glad I am doing this. I am so glad I am doing this with you. I am so proud of myself that I am taking action." Global IT Manager, Melbourne, Australia
"So Lee, I say a big thank you for our time together. I really have enjoyed it and you have given me plenty to think about over the past few months. In many ways I believe you helped steer me towards realising what it is that I am meant to be doing. You're an incrediby interesting person and I have learnt a lot from your outlook - it has been refreshing to say the least!" Lawyer, Moorgate

"I am enormously grateful for the way in which you have helped me to break through some of the blockages in my life and for the sound advice you have provided through a challenging yet exciting period. I also hope to see you at the opening of my bar next year! " Investment Banker, City

"Thanks for your great support! It is helpful and skilful. Look forward - as ever - to next meeting." Health services entrepreneur, East London

"Thank you for all your help and support over the last few months it has been great to work with you" NHS Trust Senior Executive, Hertfordshire

"The most valuable thing you have given me is perspective - a realisation that wellbeing comprises simultaneously satisfying a number of needs, and there is really no point over-focussing. Trite of course, and I knew that already, but you have really deepened my understanding of this truth. But the best thing of all: the belief that anything is possible. We are limited only by our own minds. Fantastic!" Senior Lawfirm Partner, Westminster

"'I found Lee a joy to work with, gently leading you down a fascinating path of self-discovery towards an answer or solution you were looking for, but may not have found on your own. I can recommend him highly." Hedge Fund Manager, Chelsea

"I think I was very fortunate to try your web-site first when I was looking for a life coach. I have found your guidance to be objective and uncomplicated, and you have always provided me with much needed focus. You look as though you have been eating light bulbs!" IT Professional, London Docklands

"As at now, about six months after engaging in this coaching process, I feel good, and that I have made amazing progress in discovering/digging out who I am. The validation I get out of work is being replaced by the joy of honouring my values – I get more and more fulfilled by the joy of being a loving and caring, person." VP Marketing and Development, North London

"I got some quality time to relax and think about everything... I'm still really excited about all the work we did last year." Technology Entrepreneur, Islington

"Working with Lee helped me focus where I want to go next in my life. The programme is well structured and allows achieving goals within the time frame. Lee is engaging and obviously enjoys what he is doing. Great stuff!" Oncology Consultant, Muswell Hill

"I contacted Lee when I realised the changes I needed in my life and myself were too daunting to manage on my own. Lee helped me through a journey of self discovery. I felt empowered all the way in the knowledge that Lee wasn't judging me or finding answers for me. I have resurfaced 'the real me' that had been hidden for years and am facing the new year full of ambition and determination." Management Consultant, St. Albans

"I felt very confused about which direction to take in life. Lee didn't tell me what the right answer was. What he did was to teach me the tools to realise what the possibilities were for me and then focus on the ones which really suited me. Thanks" Dental Surgeon, Farringdon

"When I first got in touch with you I was just looking for some help in getting promoted and making the best of a career I wasn't really happy with. You've helped me understand what it is I truly value in life, to rediscover my creativity and to start to believe that, instead of making the best of a joyless career, I can change direction and realise my dreams. It's been brilliant working with you". Partner Big 5 Consultancy, City of London

... and so on...

Main Menu

8 minutes reading time (1588 words)

Case Study - Recovery from a Broken Heart

Kate got in touch to explore setting up an appointment. We chatted for around 15 minutes about the wretched place that she had found herself in. She reported a visceral sadness that was consuming her mind, body, and work-week. She told me that she had never experienced feelings quite like these before. One moment she was blissfully in love, and then suddenly it was all over. It had taken her three weeks of hiding under the duvet in shock and denial before she decided to reach out for help.

I have worked with many divorcing men and women. I have worked with people in experimenting with separation. I have worked with people who have had a major break up, both the planned and the unexpected. Kate's situation felt familiar. I intuited that I could support her return to peace. We scheduled an initial coaching session for the following Tuesday. I assured her that help was on its way!

Our Heart has so much capacity to feel Love. And paradoxically the other side of love is pain. It is amazing how our hearts have the capacity to hold so much love AND so much pain.

Break up. Split up. Separation. Divorce. Urgh. These are some of the most traumatic heart-process that we can endure. These words have profound and dramatic weight. They are potent, real, and active. They invoke profound negative feelings —especially in the heart. A broken heart feels heavy, laden with sadness and fear, it is one of the strongest emotional experiences this life can throw at us. In a world where we are used feeling in-control, a broken heart surely throws us out of control – it happens to us.

There is good news though, as a broken heart can heal. I have experienced that in my own journey, and I have seen numerous clients heal their broken hearts. The birthing of a more peaceful heart is a journey that needn't be endured alone.

Kate called and left a message on the Monday, asking if we could delay for a week because she simply couldn't stop crying. That was a shame because there was work that we could do straightaway to support her to ease her pain.

We eventually met. She was ready to move on, and the resonance we created in our first session assured me that I could help her. The space I held with her was in total confidence. The life Coaching work that we did together over the next three months had several key qualities to it.

  • Developing a coping strategy
  • Support to clearing turbulent energies
  • Healing and emotional stability
  • Exploring Self love
  • Reframing life/people expectations
  • Action to Fill vacuums
  • Developing an understanding of the roles that were played
  • Preparing for a Re-invention
  • Welcoming in the new

Support through Turbulent Times

Kate shared stories of how she had met the love of her life. Their journey had been great, but she also shared that on numerous occasions her intuition had told her that "this man was bad news". We so often walk against our intuitive knowing. She shared the events that lead to the breakup. She replayed the numerous scenes of laying on the bedroom floor, sobbing uncontrollably in devastation. She told of how she didn't want it to end. She told of how she couldn't let it continue. Her heart was visibly shattered, she was in pieces.

On the threshing floor, Kate stated to reveal the core of her hearts pain. I'd say one of the most challenging discourses arose whenever Kate ventured off into her "life is supposed to be all roses and unicorns" narrative. Then she'd change tact and feel deep remorse at all the terrible things she had said to him mid-break-up. At this stage, she shared and I listened. Then deeper truths emerged --- She had lost her Love, and the life that she thought she was going to be living (even though she had ignored her doubts right from the beginning). Ultimately, she was fearful of feeling alone in the world.

It is hard to describe a broken heart better than the way sage-poet Kahlil Gibran does…

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire
By K Gibran

I've had a few broken hearts in my own journey; and anybody who's had one will know what the emotional reactions feel like. They are not pretty. Over the first few weeks, my coaching work with Kate focussed on various exercises to allow her to accept and process the raw energies that were thrashing her around. She started to lean into our work and I supported her to return to an emotional stability. She reported that the appetite loss, the wild dreams, the disruptive sleep, and future anxieties had started to subside.

Self Love

One of the joys of walking the path with a partner is the considerable investment of our hearts, our time, our emotions and ourselves into the building of a dream. A dream that nurtures our happiness. A major break up not only robs us of that happiness but also establishes the illusion that we have no hope of ever finding love again. The 'I am not lovable' narrative gains considerable territory here.

I intended that our coaching process and focus on self-love would lead her to developing a fulfilling new life, to live happily without that man that she loved. The coaching work eventually changed gear, it was now time to use the break up as an opportunity for Kate to learn about herself. Her homework was a feeling-honouring exercise. I showed her that her feelings of grief were holding a lot of wisdom. Truthfully that wisdom is hard to access when consumed by blubbing. But as we start to take perspective on the whole situation, we can pave the way to return to a powerful centre. Life crisis is so often an opportunity for growth and self-betterment.

Life coaching focuses on action and the formulation of new choices and habits. We don't dwell too much in the how did I get here, preferring to focus more on the how do I make the next decade have the qualities that I wish to welcome in. My guidance to her was to prioritise happiness. A focus on filling life with desired situations is often one of the best solutions to neutralising a heartbreak. Time can heal faster when we give ourselves permission to focus on the cultivation of new possibilities. Truthfully this phase the work tends to take a lot of time. Finding wisdom embedded in heart-pain is often a daunting process.

I urged Kate to live one hour at a time. I shared some Gratitude practices to go and experiment with. These simple practices proved very effective at snapping her out of complete downers. I also urged her to keep a journal as a way of transforming negative waves into positive moments. There were times where she struggled though and even gratitude proved to be weak-medicine. In those moments I told her to create safe-space, and then indulge in gratitude for having a really good cry. Embrace the cry, accept the cry. That was the sacred fire. Then at the other side of the cry welcome in some new peace. After all, really feeling the heartache is an important healing process. There isn't any shame in mindfully experiencing all those raw energies. Indeed, its an important process on the path to feeling normal again.

Re-Invention

When we have expectations of how other people should behave, speak, act, love, touch, understand. We surely set ourselves up for a major broken heart, when they don't.
Kate would often return to the narrative of how things could have been, should have been. We did several exercises exploring how feelings can change when she starts to eliminate expectations. Expectations of how her man should have behaved. Expectations of how life could have been. Acceptance is the great healer.

Kate had journeyed through shock, denial, pain, guilt, anger and loneliness. At some precious point in the heart-break journey, you can feel the tipping point when a client is ready to step into the new. To re-construct and re-invent. In many ways that's when some proper life coaching can begin. It is with alacrity that I love to support people through major life changes. My work always focusses on Authenticity and alignment with that authenticity.

Coaching work is dynamic, custom and targeted to an individual's unique situation, but don't forget the basics like…

  • Get support
  • Talk with friends and family (especially those who can pump you up)
  • Journal
  • Eat well
  • Sweaty exercise
  • Be in big Nature (I find the Sea amazing!)
  • Rest

Hope

Perhaps the most rewarding part of the life coaching journey through heart-break was when I reminded Kate that she would love and be loved again. Hope springs eternal and when the heart is healed it will open to love again.

I have reconstructed this case study from several client histories to demonstrate a range of coaching interventions.

...

Support through Divorce or Separation - Passion - Great Life Coach London

Support through Divorce or Separation - Passion Life Coaching through a Divorce, Uncoupling and Separation Arguments, uncertainty, fear, misunderstanding, unheard, sex-less, unromantic, where did our love go. You have probably only found your way to this

What types of life -change assignment can you help me with? - FAQ - Great Life Coach London

What types of life -change assignment can you help me with? FAQ Experienced Coach -- Some typical Life Coaching assignments So what do people use a life coach for?
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Living Passionately

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Sunday, 18 November 2018

Google Reviews...

google 5star coach1- Thank you very much for your good work Lee. Thanks to our sessions I've been able to design a good plan for my next project. It's been lovely to be able to talk to you without being judged, really openly.
google 5star coach2- Lee truly guided me on to the right path. I was stuck, frustrated, unsure of where to turn. I saw Lee once a month for just over a year, and i can honestly say this was the best decision i've ever made. Thank you again Lee!
google 5star coach3- I am so thankful for my time with Lee, he is so kind and full of positive energy. Lee helped me through a difficult transitional period in my life and acted as a guide, shedding light on what I really wanted and gave me a new perspective on how to gain it. His energy, inspirational attitude and deep care for others is uplifting and contagious but what's more is that he's completely authentic and genuine, making him an incredible Life Coach.
google 5star coach4- Lee is an amazing life coach with wisdom and strength.  The little time spent with lee has had a great impact on my life without doubt !  When balance isn't in your life then lee is the man to help you find this.  He is a strong hand to hold when when life is uncertain and fear holds you back!
google 5star coach6- I was feeling a bit stuck in life and decided to do some life coaching.  Lee was superb.  He helped me identify where I want to be, why I'm not there at the moment, and how to get myself going in the right direction.  Life has already changed considerably since working with him.  A lovely man and a great coach!
google 5star coach7- I met Lee at a point in my life when I was dealing with significant change.  I needed someone who could help me approach my choices in a systematic and holistic way, and he has done that.  He has an approach that is different and fresh, and an ability to adapt that style to meet my particular needs.  He has helped me confront many issues and get onto a better life path.
google 5star coach8- I have been working with Lee for over 3 years. I had reached a particular crossroads in life and working with him has enabled me to reach a good place. The coaching has made such a positive difference. Left to my own devices I might have advanced my self-knowledge a little but nothing to the degree of insight that I have been able to develop with Lee. In fact, without such insight, I don't know which direction my life might now be taking. Now I do, and the journey has been wonderful. Looking back I can say that this has been the best thing I have spent money on because it has been an investment in myself.
google 5star coach9- I contacted Lee six months ago as I was about to make a big choice to leave my job and change my life. I wanted help from someone who was not invested in my life in any way, and thus could objectively support and challenge me as I powered through that change. I hadn’t expected to enjoy the process quite so much, or to get from Lee so much more than I’d bargained for. Do not be fooled into thinking that coaching with Lee will simply examine the practical mechanics of your life. He has got me to deeply scrutinise the how, the what, and the why of who I am with searing yet playful courage and honesty. With lightness, a sprinkling of humour, infectious enthusiasm, and beautiful spirituality, Lee creates a clear, quiet space that accepts and queries what you will unpack together. His incisiveness has often left me gasping/laughing/both at the eye-opening revelations about myself. I am learning to become who I am and fully inhabit an amazing life for myself, and I am deeply grateful & happy that I chose to invest in this work.
google 5star coach10- I have been working with Lee for a number of months now, and his support has been very important to me, as I attempt to rationalise recent life experiences and move forward to a happier, positive future. I look forward to our sessions and under his guidance have explored why I have felt unhappy in the past, and identify what I must do to become the person I want to be. Lee is hugely experienced and very empathetic, but he will also tell you some home truths when needed. Everyone at a crossroads in their life could benefit from his approach. He comes highly recommended!
google 5star coach11- I decided to start the life coaching sessions with Lee when I moved to London earlier last year. I seemed to have a perfect life but I know it's not what I wanted. Lee helped me to make smarter decisions when facing the crossroad, and to look inside myself to live the life I really wanted. I would recommend him to everyone who wants to make a change and live the life to the fullest.Thank you Lee!
google 5star coach13- Lee is a wise and thoughtful person to speak with and has some great tips on how to really find your passion in life. I really enjoyed his company and found his words a great guide for helping me to find my true and best path in life.
google 5star coach14- I decided to have Life Coaching with Lee last year as I felt I had hit a crossroads.  Although I knew I had the all the answers myself, I needed some direction to help me pull the answers from within! Lee started with some simple exercises to get me thinking about what my true 'Rachelness' wanted from life and then we took it from there.  During this journey, I'll be honest I did resent Lee on occasion, but this was because he was making me face my insecurities and that can be uncomfortable (really it was myself I was resenting).  Lee makes it very easy for you to talk openly about how the process is making you feel and is an extremely kind man.  I have made some big changes since last year, I've moved to the seaside, found a partner who loves the outdoors as much as me and sorted out some long standing health issues! I feel GREAT! Thank you Lee you helped me release my inner self :)
google 5star coach12- I've worked with Lee for the last two months in an effort to bring some harmony back to my personal and professional life. Lee's background in business, as well as his spiritual side has helped greatly with practical advice while also providing a framework to re-focus my energy on the things in life that are important to me...I'm looking forward to continuing to build on the success so far - well worth the investment!
google 5star coach15- Lee is a very special and talented individual who I am really pleased to have 'worked' with. I decided to have life coaching as I felt I was at an important age to be making some directional choices for my career - I had dabbled in a second career (my own business) on and off for a couple of years but just couldn't decide if I should take the full plunge into this career choice or not. Working with Lee, we set about finding out what my true values are and how this career choice might (or might not) serve them. Of course, along the way I learnt much much more than this. I can say with absolute certainty this work was one of the most important investments of my time and money in my grand old 28 years of life. Lee is not a magician and you need to dedicate time and energy into 'homework' if you're serious about self-realisation, Lee can guide you but it's you that has to do the work. I was very very busy throughout the most part of our time together but part of the magic of coaching is that you become answerable to somebody else and you have set deadlines (which you'll set yourself). Often when I look back at my coaching I realise that there's never a 'good time' for life coaching, you need to MAKE time before you LOSE time. Like all good enablers, Lee worked to make himself eventually redundant to me (for now) and I've come away with a clear career direction and a better understanding of myself. I'm on a long old mountain climb to fulfilling my business dream but I'm already 10 times higher up the mountain than I would have been without my coaching with Lee. It's not easier work but I now know I'm choosing the correct path and I'm super confident I'll get there or die trying!
google 5star coach2- Lee helped me when I was facing a true crisis of spirit. There are certain instances from our coaching sessions which will forever be engrained as a positive marker in my mind- serving me in recalling the importance of following the path. Thank you Lee.
google 5star coach14- Thanks to Lee's methods I made some decitions that brought me to a healthier, happier and more relaxing place. I could make a decition that it was dificult for me to make and I did it feeling very confident and with the tranquility that everything will be fine. I could see what is good for me, what my needs are and I am happy to be able to make my own decitions. Lee guides you towards those things that make you feel better. You get to know yourself very deeply. It is a very interesting process and I want more of it. :) Thanks to Lee I know now what is the mountain that I want to climb and that It is important to expres oneself on time according to your feelings and thoughts. Thank you!
google 5star coach11- I've been one of Lee's clients for about three years now and he's helped me make massive strides forward, changing a career that was draining my energy and helping to focus on what I love doing in life.  He's great fun and refreshing to work with (especially when you feel tired and trapped) but he's also good at tough love too!  Highly highly recommended!
google 5star coach8- I have been a life coach client of Lee for nearly two years and I love working with him. He has helped me to be the true me and move towards my ambition of living at peace with myself and everyone else. Wherever you are in your life journey, Lee can help you move forwards and upwards. All you need to take with you to your sessions is openess and willingness. I can't recommend him enough.
google 5star coach3- I came to Lee with a specific agenda. I knew I wasn't happy on the inside and I knew that I had wanted (and needed) to do things differently. Lee provided a thought provoking framework and path forward. Out of those thoughts great things have occurred. We then moved into a period of action which still hurtles forward today and in a direction I am totally rapt with. Lee is now a valuable and trusted member of my team. Don't think about it any longer - just try it for yourself.